Have you ever said the words, “I’m my own worst enemy?”

Do you judge/criticize yourself throughout the day?

Do you struggle in personal and/or professional relationships?

Do you find yourself trying to please people and/or not speaking up when you’re upset OR lashing out when you’ve held things in for too long?

If your relationship with yourself is tense, uncomfortable, demanding, and frustrating, you may think it’s simply because you’re trying to improve yourself. It may seem that if you could just be better, stronger, less emotional, that things would be easier. In truth, approaching yourself this way is a good sign you may be dealing with unhealed attachment trauma, especially if you grew up in an environment that was challenging or even unsafe.

The way you talk to yourself and treat yourself when life gets complicated reflects the quality of your earliest attachments. If they were compromised or severed (by abuse, addiction, adoption, divorce, mental illness, or other factors), you might not have a clear model of how to care for yourself and support yourself through life’s challenges. As a result, you default to self-blame and judgement. But there is a better way.

My approach involves helping you build a new relationship with yourself that will change everything else in your life. Through self-compassion and mindfulness, we will give a voice to the parts that were not well attended to the first time around: the vulnerable parts you learned to “manage” or hide instead of loving.

Sometimes, people feel better during therapy but then struggle to apply what they’ve learned later on. My approach involves using deep listening to understand your specific struggles, and then teaching you specific, skills to help you work through difficult emotions and tolerate distress. I work from a foundation of Internal Family Systems and DBT (Dialectical Behavior Therapy).

Call, text, or email me to schedule a free, 15-minute consultation about your current situation. Appointments are generally available within a week.